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Monday, June 29, 2009
In My Mind
Dear Briana,
I have been missing you for almost a full two years now and your loss still feels so new and raw. I look at your sister, who is getting so big and discovering so many new things, and can't help but try to imagine you at her age. She is just so full of fun and personality and I know that you would had been so much the same, yet so vastly different, so I can't help but ponder...and wonder. I try to picture you and your features at the mature age of 9 months, now that I see Avalyn changing daily right before my very eyes. Her face is becoming so "unbaby" like, so mature, so kid-like. She is transforming from a small, helpless infant to a rambunctious, go-go toddler. How I wish I could have witnessed your transformation. But I can still imagine. I look at your pictures and in my mind create another image of you, that's how I can keep you alive and watch you grow. I often wonder how you look in Heaven. From what I know, you look exactly like, well...you, and how you were before. So that when I go to Heaven, I know who to look for. I cry thinking of that moment, when you are mine once more. I am sure when I see you, you will be shining like the sun, and it will be impossible to miss you. Until then, I will imagine you, you will grow up in my mind.
I love you Briana.
Mommy
I have been missing you for almost a full two years now and your loss still feels so new and raw. I look at your sister, who is getting so big and discovering so many new things, and can't help but try to imagine you at her age. She is just so full of fun and personality and I know that you would had been so much the same, yet so vastly different, so I can't help but ponder...and wonder. I try to picture you and your features at the mature age of 9 months, now that I see Avalyn changing daily right before my very eyes. Her face is becoming so "unbaby" like, so mature, so kid-like. She is transforming from a small, helpless infant to a rambunctious, go-go toddler. How I wish I could have witnessed your transformation. But I can still imagine. I look at your pictures and in my mind create another image of you, that's how I can keep you alive and watch you grow. I often wonder how you look in Heaven. From what I know, you look exactly like, well...you, and how you were before. So that when I go to Heaven, I know who to look for. I cry thinking of that moment, when you are mine once more. I am sure when I see you, you will be shining like the sun, and it will be impossible to miss you. Until then, I will imagine you, you will grow up in my mind.
I love you Briana.
Mommy
Monday, June 1, 2009
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