Dear Briana
Today is Thanksgiving Day and as I am baking in the kitchen, you are on my mind. We like to spend today with those we are most thankful for, sharing memories and laughs over a delicious turkey dinner, playing games and watching the Thanksgiving Day parade or a classic Christmas comedy. With this in mind, my day wouldn't be complete if I didn't spend some time remembering one of the things I am most thankful for - you. You may not be here to join us at the table or play amongst your cousins, but you are always present in my heart and in my mind. I am most thankful for the memories you gave me and the time we shared - those can never be forgotten or replaced. I still thank God for you even now that you are gone. Every parent tells of how much their children taught them, about how much they have grown as a person because of their children, and I think I can say that even more so because of you. You have taught me so much; perhaps more than I wanted. But because of you, I am a strong person - stronger than ever before.
You have taught me how to be a mother. You have taught me humility, compassion, discipline, the virtue of being a parent, you have taught me how to truly love, and how to truly let go. You have taught me how to forgive; you have taught me that I am courageous, that I am good, that it's okay to hate myself as long as I can forgive myself, you have taught me that tears can heal, that time does have some magic. You have taught me the full spectrum of joy and the full spectrum of grief. You have taught me that there is indeed always sunshine after the storm; that life does go on - if you like it or not. You have taught me that it's okay that the world doesn't stop when mine does. You have taught me that people do mean good just may have a hard time knowing how to express it. You have taught me that I am LOVED! You have taught me that perhaps God doesn't have a handle on it all; that I am the one in charge of my life. You have taught me that things happen; good and bad, and sometimes there's just no way around it; yet sometimes there is, but you may never know. You have taught me that things aren't always fair, aren't always right, but I must move forward. You have taught me to live for today and not for yesterday or tomorrow. You have taught me that today is what matters; to make the best of it. You have taught me how to fight; how to fight for my life or for what's left of it. I fought hard, and because of you, I won. I am forever thankful, today and always.
I love you, as always
Mommy
