On My Mind

Dear Briana

Your sister is taking a nap and I can't get you out of my head. I always think of you during moments like these; quiet times I have alone to myself. It's hard to think about anything other than your sister when she is awake, and clinging to my legs yelling "Mommy!".

She is growing so big and becoming extremely talkative. In fact, she really never stops talking. It's amazing how quickly she is turning into a little girl and no longer my baby. I look at her all of the time and try to see you in her, but I can't. When I was pregnant with her, I prayed she would look just like you, but she never has. I just wanted to be reminded of you. I wanted to see you all day. I wanted to see you grow. I wanted everything we missed out on. But your sister is so, so different.

I miss you so much. You would be three years old. I see other kids around that age, with their long hair thrown back in ponytails, running around and playing and talking. If I think about it too much, it really hurts me. Thanks to your sister though, it's almost impossible to dwell on it for long. Still, I wish I could see you as a three-year-old.

I love you

As Always

Mommy