Letters to Heaven

Dearest Briana

We all miss you so much, Briana. Time doesn't make the longing disappear. Your sister is 5 months old now and is keeping mommy and daddy on our toes every waking moment, but we are enjoying it immensely. I look at her and sometimes see you, looking right back at me, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed. Your sister reminds me of you so much, even though you look vastly different. She shares a lot of the same personality traits as you; she is extremely fiesty; has her cuddly, gentle moments when she is all smiles, then she has her stubborn, demanding moments when it seems like nothing will soothe her. She LOVES being outside so we spend a lot of time out there. She is eager to learn and explore, just like you, but hasn't quite figured out how to get around much just yet. You were trying to crawl at day 1. So much alike, you two. Knowing that brings boths smiles and tears and it always will.

No matter how busy I am, you are always foremost on my mind. I look at your pictures all of the time so that at any moment when I want to remember your face, I can see it as clear as day. I think of our times together, constantly refreshing my memory. You made me so happy, Briana, and losing you temporarily took all of my happiness away. Now that I am able to remember and sometimes smile about it, some of that happiness is being restored back into my life. Your sister has also restored some of that happiness, too. I have to be happy for her, and for your dad, and for myself. I remind myself that it is okay to be happy, it is okay to smile and to love life. I know you want that for me.

I am missing you, always.

Mommy